Inescapable--Twilight Fanfiction Bash Site
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"People do not deserve good writing, they are so pleased with bad." Ralph Waldo Emerson |
My Last Breath by air xXx guitar
Remember the points on the You Know You've Written a Bad Twilight Fanfiction When... regarding New Moon plots and creating a songfic using an Evanescence song while writing about the cliff-diving scene?
Point in case.
Overdone plot + overdone band + overdone song = badfic
That and songfics are now banned by Fanfiction.Net. You know, there's a reason why you're supposed to read over the rules and agree if you want to submit new stories.
In addition, I can't be sure but I think that just maybe Stephenie did write this scene. Bella was standing at the cliff, she's listening to Edward's voice and decides to jump.
Apart from the fact that she writes much better, I fail to see the basic difference between the book and this. And fanfiction means playing with canon; if the basic premise is practically identical, why do I want to read the fanfic when I can just read the book?
Oh, but this one took the road less taken. Bella is listening to his voice, someone whose name is never cleared until the end. She's in so much pain, she wants to jump, knowing the pretty rocks below will end her life quickly. Then, Jacob tries to save her. But, Bella with her single-track mind, can only think of "his" voice and throws herself over the cliff.
Three guesses as to who "he" is.
Yes, ladies and gentlemen, she was listening to Edward's voice. Shocker, I know. The one piece of information withheld from the audience and the one building suspense ends up being Edward.
It would have been a wonderful moment to insert a unforeseen turn that later generated an astoundingly intricate and interesting plot. But no, we got Edward. Why not listen to Angela's voice? I like her; she's awesome. And she's rarely used which would ensure originality. But nooo, we get a repeat of New Moon, albeit with a more suicidal Bella.
Yay.
Quotes of Goodness:
"Bella! Please! Don't do it! I'm not worth it!" he shouted in desperation.
I bet you my eyeball you wouldn't have know who "he" is unless I told you.
I couldn't deal with life anymore.
Take a number, sweetheart. We're all in this.
I didn't know which was worse: the searing pain in my heart or the sick feeling I got whenever I looked over the edge and thought about jumping.
Who says you have to choose? That sick feeling could be the result of nausea. And nausea could, in turn, be the warning sign of an upset stomach, which is causing the stomach fluids to climb back up the esophagus. The stomach acid begins burning the esophagus and, since it is close to the heart, it seems as if your heart is hurting when, in reality, it's not. Both are the cause of the same thing; it's all heartburn! No need to throw yourself off a cliff. Just genuflect to Peptobismol!
When your stomach's feeling dismal, take soothing Pepto-Bismol!
*Alcyone genuflects to the mindboggling power of Peptobismol*